I think every mom has had a “veteran” mom—usually an empty nester, with grandkids—pat her on the hand and command her to cherish these times, lament how much they miss the dirty handprints on the windows they just washed, and/or wax nostalgic on how wonderful it was to wake up every two hours with an infant. (Only slightly exaggerating on the last one.)
To which moms in the throes of motherhood pretty much think, “REALLY?!?!”
I like to think that memory has glossed over how difficult raising children is—I’m just shy of six years in with my first, and there are already many difficult periods in our lives that have been covered with the benignant mists of time.
Thank heaven. Today is hard enough as it is; can you imagine if all the past trials we’ve endured came crashing down on us whenever we thought about them?
So maybe one day, I’ll be able to look back and say that I enjoyed it—overall. I hope I never forget how hard it was—or at the very least, that it was hard. Because it is hard and I’m not going to pretend like it’s not.
But I think Glennon at Momastery said it much better:
I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that  most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.
And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!”  – those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.
If you have somehow missed “Don’t Carpe Diem,” you have to fix that. Seriously. Now. If you have ever been tempted to bodily harm a well-meaning old lady who tells you how she’d give anything to have her little babies back (or maybe just sic your babies on her), if you’ve ever struggled with perspective and wondering how, exactly, changing so many diapers was suppose to be the ennobling, important calling you’re searching for, if you just need to be reminded that motherhood is worth it—go read it.
Photo by Ed Yourdon