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Fulfillment Contests

Feeling Fulfilled Fridays 9

It’s feeling fulfilled Friday on MamaBlogga! Here’s how it works:

  1. Make a list of things that make you feel accomplished (but aren’t so huge that they take more than a day or a week)
  2. During the week, try to focus on those things that help us feel accomplished
  3. Report on feeling fulfilled Friday

And it’s time for a Group Writing Project!

My week: All things considered, it’s been a pretty good week. Although I seem to be pathologically incapable of getting in bed before midnight, and Rachel pathologically incapable of sleeping past six all of a sudden, I knew I was going to have to make an extra effort to remain sane this week. And of course, sometimes when you strive to be everything you can for your kids, all they can do is demand more. But hey, sometimes when you make the extra effort, it actually works!

Group Writing Project!
It’s been over a year since the last Group Writing Project on MamaBlogga. As a quick refresher, a GWP is when we all write on the same topic, to see lots of different peoples’ perspective on a topic. This time, the details will be a little different. Instead of one entry a piece submitted over a week, we’re going to have lots of possible entries per person, over the course of the month!

How to enter:
During the month of October, participate in Feeling Fulfilled Fridays. You can enter blog posts on things that make you feel accomplished (especially as a mother), your “feeling accomplished” list, and of course, a Feeling Fulfilled Friday report.

Blog entries must be new, posted in October 2010, and you must use the form to submit each entry (it’s too easy for me to miss them otherwise!).

Other ways to enter: spread the word about the Feeling Fulfilled Friday GWP on Twitter, Facebook or another social network. (But I must be able to see your post—if your Tweets are protected or your Facebook privacy so high that I can’t see the posts, I can’t count them!) Again, use the form to let me know.

What you win
Yes, seriously. There’s a prize. Maybe more than one—depending on how many entries we get.

At least one post, chosen at random, will receive a gift card to Amazon.com! Woot! Fill up your Kindle—or make a downpayment on one!

Get the GWP badge

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Get the FFF badge

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Or smaller:

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Previous Group Writing Projects:

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Fulfillment

Feeling Fulfilled Fridays 7 & 8

It’s feeling fulfilled Friday on MamaBlogga! Here’s how it works:

  1. Make a list of things that make you feel accomplished (but aren’t so huge that they take more than a day or a week)
  2. During the week, try to focus on those things that help us feel accomplished
  3. Report on feeling fulfilled Friday

Man. I just realized that I’d worked so hard on last week’s post—but never pushed Publish. Arg!

This week: I’m adding something new to my list of things that feel accomplished. Even though I’m an introvert (or possibly because I’m an introvert), taking the kids out for errands and/or something fun makes me feel accomplished.

Monday, I wanted to pick up some new conditioner and milk and eggs (conveniently forgetting the fact that Ryan bought a fresh dozen on Saturday). There was also a pet store and a book store that often has inexpensive kids’ books and activities, so I added those to our trip. And yesterday, I took the kids to play in one of the play areas of the mall.

Taking the kids out also guarantees that we’ll all get dressed and we’ll get away from the computer and the television. (I swear those things have tractor beams!)

Last week:
This week has had some of my highest recent moments of motherhood—and my lowest moments ever.

This week, a family member took me aside to praise me on how well I’m working with Hayden. He’s a pretty typical four-year-old, I hope. He throws several tantrums a day and the most common response to not getting what he wants the second he wants it is to fly off the handle.

(Ahem. No idea where he gets it.)

And every once in a while, I can look like I’m handling it well. Now that makes me feel accomplished!

What’s made you feel accomplished this week?

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Fulfillment

Feeling fulfilled Fridays 6

It’s feeling fulfilled Friday on MamaBlogga! Here’s how it works:

  1. Make a list of things that make you feel accomplished (but aren’t so huge that they take more than a day or a week)
  2. During the week, try to focus on those things that help us feel accomplished
  3. Report on feeling fulfilled Friday

This week I happened to come across my list again and reread it. (The last couple weeks I’ve been working from memory.) I’d forgotten that many of the things I had on my list were so simple.

And I think that’s the bottom line of this exercise: recognizing the simple things in motherhood that make us feel good, like we’ve done something productive, and focusing on those things.

Motherhood isn’t about doing—but most of motherhood is doing. If we can do more of the things that make us feel good about what we’re doing, I hope we can feel better about what we’re doing as a whole.

Edited to add: Lindsey’s feeling fulfilled!

What do you think? What makes you feel accomplished? Are we ready to participate?

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Fulfillment

Feeling Fulfilled Fridays (Five)

Or You’re Doing it RIGHT

It’s feeling fulfilled Friday on MamaBlogga! Here’s how it works:

  1. Make a list of things that make you feel accomplished (but aren’t so huge that they take more than a day or a week)
  2. During the week, try to focus on those things that help us feel accomplished
  3. Report on feeling fulfilled Friday

This week has been okay. Honestly, I haven’t made much of an effort to focus on the things on my list, but looking back, I did make an effort to turn off the TV for significant time a few times. In bigger news, I finished my latest round of revisions on my manuscript, so that feels good, and I wrote a first draft of a short story, which felt great!

But the constant bickering that marks motherhood is really starting to wear on me: the kids fighting with each other, the kids fighting with me on every little thing. I can only stand so many decibels per day, and the whining and screaming and the bickering drive me crazy. And it seems like if we were doing a good job of parenting, they would eventually learn that screaming and fighting don’t help anyone (and just make mom mad!).

This morning, however, I caught a moment alone (and got to shower!), and I realized that this is just one example of how we’re doing it right. If we just gave in every time to try to avoid the tantrum, they wouldn’t learn anything, and would probably be more difficult to live with!

So just because motherhood is hard doesn’t mean we’re doing it wrong—in fact, it may mean we’re doing it right!

What have you done to feel accomplished this week? What have you done right this week?

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Fulfillment

Feeling accomplished—doing something you can control

So much of motherhood is out of our control. We can’t control if or when we get pregnant, despite our best efforts. And it goes downhill from there. One of the first things we learn as a mother (and then spend the rest of our lives learning, it seems), is that these are little people—little, independent people. Although you can try to create the most favorable conditions possible, you can’t make them sleep, you can’t make them eat—and the list only grows as they get bigger.

The sense of accomplishment that I’m going for with Feeling Fulfilled Fridays might be looking for a little control in motherhood—and that’s not a bad thing, I think. We have to recognize what we can and can’t control, and then focus on what we can control.

When I made out my list of things that make me feel accomplished, I purposefully left some stuff off. I feel very accomplished when my children grasp something new, when I get them to do their chores, when we all get along.

But I can’t force my children to understand something, or physically compel them to clean up, or make them not scream and hit. I can’t tie my happiness to things I can’t control—the little everyday up and downs of living with other people.

Instead, I looked for things that I can control—I can try to teach them something new (regardless of whether they get it). I can instruct them (and, if necessary, discipline them) in doing their chores. I can spend time with them doing things they like and being kind and patient with them, creating an environment where we’re more likely to get along.

Being happy, as a mom and as a person, is just too important to leave to chance—and too big a responsibility to place on our children. They can’t force us to be happy any more than we can make them fall asleep.

What do you do to help get “control” in your life? How does that work? How does that make you feel accomplished?

Photo by DM

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Fulfillment

Feeling fulfilled Friday 4

This week has been kind of interesting.

I’ve done a few things to feel accomplished: I’ve worked hard to be patient, I’ve exercised and I tore us away from the television, even if we had to leave the house (and spend money at the grocery store).

It’s really gratifying to be able to look at your week and know that it’s more than just a list of frustrations, and more than just a list of accomplishments, too. I felt this way this afternoon while I played blocks with Hayden. As simple as something like playing blocks seems, it’s little things like that at the heart of motherhood.

I’m also working on one last pass of my manuscript (again/for now), and I have to confess that sometimes I’ve let that take over. It’s hours of work a day—usually far more than I have time to do it. (As if that wasn’t already the story of a mom’s life!)

But I’m pushing myself really hard because I want to finish by the end of the month. It’s an arbitrary, self-imposed deadline—the worst kind.

After Hayden played blocks and went in to quiet time, I had to deal with a fussy baby for a while. (She still doesn’t like to be put down.) I complained that I hadn’t gotten anything done. While I’m focusing on feeling accomplished in motherhood, it’s not about getting things done—something I’ve said for a long time.

How’s that for a fine distinction 😉 ?

What have you done this week that made you feel accomplished? Want to share on your blog? Grab a badge!